Loss of sexual desire?

What can I do about loss of sexual desire?

If you have experienced loss of desire for only a short time, it may take care of itself. Getting out of stressful or anxious situations may also alleviate the condition. Try to think about what the cause may be for you personally. It could be your partner, your environment, or a number of other factors listed below. If the loss of desire persists, ask your doctor to refer you to a sex therapist who can help.

There are a number of things that you can try on your own to help increase your libido and get you thinking sexy again. Many people shy away from sex toys because they think that they’re unnatural or awkward, however they help a lot of people to start taking care of themselves sexually. With or without a partner, sex toys can help you find new and exciting ways of pleasuring yourself and break up stagnant sexual routines which can squelch your libido. Other things that you can try to liven things up are adult videos and books. Despite the reputation of this type of material, there are actually a lot of high quality videos and books that are designed to arouse, teach you new techniques and even help you with sexual problems.

There are also some products that have been specifically designed to increase your sexual arousal during the act itself. For example, I.D. Pleasure is a high-market lubricant containing L-Arginine. L-Arginine is a non-essential amino acid which, through clinical testing, has been shown to enhance sexual arousal in both men and women. When ID Pleasure is applied to the clitoris, vaginal walls or penis for lubrication the L-Arginine will increase the blood flow to the region, heightening sensitivity. Heightened sensitivity, in turn, naturally results in a greater responsiveness to sexual stimulation.

What causes loss of sexual desire?

One cannot generalize as to why someone is experiencing a low level of sexual desire. Loss of libido can have a variety of causes, some psychological, some not.

Stress and fatigue

Perhaps the leading cause of lost sexual desire is stress and fatigue. Most often, the condition is temporary and returns when the stressful period ends, or the person is able to get appropriate rest.

Stress compounds relationship issues as one partner is not able to devote an appropriate amount of energy to their partner. Couples need to take make time to spend in a relatively stress-free environment. Take a romantic vacation or perhaps just send the kids to your parents house for the night. If you’re looking for something to enjoy with your lover, the Kama Sutra Massage Therapy Kit is a wonderful item. It contains all the items you’ll need to massage the stress away. In today’s hectic lifestyle, often couples don’t spend enough time relaxing together. Start with one evening together. You’ll be surprised at how your libido comes racing back.


Sex can arouse a lot of anxiety in some people who are unsure of themselves or fear humiliation. For someone who has never had sex or has had a bad experience with sex, the anxiety level can be overwhelming. One may fear that they will not be able to become aroused or excited and fail their partner. Alternatively, one might fear the consequences of sexual activity (pregnancy or STDs). Fear of the sexual situation because of failure or negative consequences can decrease their interest in sexual activity.

Estrangement from partner

One who is angry at their partner can express this frustration through a lack of sexual desire. It may be difficult to engage in sexual activity when unresolved conflicts persist. Any negative feelings toward your partner may be incompatible with the prospect of sexual intimacy which decreases your level of arousal.

Misdirected sexual desire

This phenomenon often occurs in the case of “closeted” gay men and women. While actual sexual desire may be quite high for members of their appropriate sexual orientation, many people ashamed or insecure about their sexuality will still force themselves to desire the wrong sex. Often closeted individuals marry and have children while still suffering from lack of sexual desire for their spouses. Others may be disturbed by their fantasies or fetishes and may wish to forget them by repressing their sexual desire.

Loss of erotic associations

The loss of libido can be a psychological process whereby the brain systematically re-labels stimuli which were once erotic as non-erotic. Sexually appealing stimuli in the environment are no longer associated with arousal. With the help of a registered sex therapist, this psychological condition can often be overcome.

Physiological causes

Not all the causes of low sexual desire are psychological in nature. Low sexual desire in older men can be caused by a low level of the hormone androgen. Hormonal deficiency can sometimes be treated with hormone injections. Consult your doctor or sex therapist for all the answers.

Anything that adversely affects your metabolism will undoubtedly cause some lack of sexual desire. This may include an accident, trauma or illness that causes a metabolic disturbance.

Different drugs have different effects on sexual desire. You should read the label or ask your doctor or pharmacist about the effects of any pharmaceutical products on your libido.